A few weeks ago I met a student on the road named Dario and he shared with me the pressure he feels around bullying and his thoughts of suicide. We talked a great deal that day about his life and his feelings, as well as the often unspoken truths about suicide. Through just a short conversation about his interests and dreams, I was able to discover Dario’s inner strength and help him turn his negative thoughts into positive strengths.

I care about how Dario feels because I believe that the pressure he was experiencing is normal. I know I have felt it, and many students I meet on the road feel it as well.

Here in Austin we have amazing wild flowers that bloom across the city. Up and down the freeways, in all the parks and hiking trails, these beautiful flowers bloom for as far as the eye can see. But just a few weeks ago they didn’t exist. Not a single one! They were merely seeds trapped away in a cold dark place below the surface of the earth. Shrouded in darkness, these seeds were once in a cold dark place much like the one that Dario found himself in a few weeks ago.

What I find so interesting about these flowers is that once their seeds crack through their outer shells they start growing. They can’t go back, they can’t stop, they can’t be scared, they just push through the dark to get to the light because that is what they were put on earth to do!

I hope these flowers can give Dario a glimmer of hope, because I believe if he were able to crack his outer shell and start growing upwards towards the light he would never need or want to stop. He would bloom into the wonderful person that he is about to become.

All of us find ourselves in dark places from time to time. Will we just stay in that dark cold place missing all the light and beauty that the world has to offer? Or will we crack that shell and start growing?

Sincerely,

In 1999, we began filming for our first movie, “TEEN TRUTH: BULLYING & SCHOOL VIOLENCE.” Debuting in 2006, our film covers bullying, suicide, depression and the all-too-common effects of exclusion through the stories of real teens who told us the hard TRUTHS that we all needed to hear. Our first film launched the start of a movement that has brought our message to hundreds of thousands of teens, adults, teachers and administrators throughout the U.S. and Canada. We’ve worked hard to empower teens and adults to learn how to create cultures of compassion on their school campuses.

But it’s now 2012, six years after we began this journey, and we’re still talking about bullying the same as before. We’re tired of the short-lived waves of awareness whenever the issue finds its way into the mainstream like it has again with “Bully.” We tired of finding ourselves outraged by the violence that too often mars teen lives. And frankly, we’re tired of even the words “bully” and “bullying.”

We can’t help but ask ourselves: Why are we talking about bullying as if it’s a new epidemic? The sad truth is, too many teens have already died from this silent scourge and too many more will likely die because we are failing to act. When will we stop making this about some word and start making it about each and everyone of us?

Bullying is the number one issue facing teens on middle and high school campuses, but its prevention has yet to become an integral part of school curriculum in a manner that we feel is truly effective. We spend too much time applying band-aids and duct tape to a problem that requires a real community effort. We have spent the last thirteen years working on this subject and have spoken to over one million youth and we believe we have an understanding of what needs to be done. If you want to know what that direction is, ask us!

So often the disconnect in the lives of teens and their parents and adults who care about them leaves far too much room for teens to suffer in silence. We know from our TEEN TRUTH: BULLY & SCHOOL VIOLENCE presentations that nearly 100% of the teens, teachers and administrators we talk to have either been bullied or bullied others. We also know that far too few have shared their painful TRUTHS with a trusted adult. To us, this signals a major social collapse. We are failing to acknowledge that teens are not only already living these TRUTHS, they’re struggling to find to an outlet for their pain – some of them literally dying because of it.

Awareness shouldn’t be a passing fad that we forget about – the violence being done to and by teens is an issue requiring our full and vigilant attention. It’s not enough to talk about it for a week or two when something tragic happens or controversy over a new film sparks debate. It’s up to each one of us to step up and work as hard as we can to create a culture of compassion.

When we take the time to LISTEN to what the teens in our lives are dealing with, we give ourselves the opportunity to encourage the important conversations that can lead to a change. When we encourage teens to use their VOICES, we nurture their ability to speak their TRUTHS. When we come together to support each other, we take that all important step towards BEING THE DIFFERENCE.

Though “Bully” won’t be shown in schools because of the rating debate, it doesn’t mean that teens have to miss out on the chance to confront the most important topic in American education. We have one of the premier award winning films on bullying that can be shown in schools and was actually filmed by real youth– and so far, our film has reached over nearly 2.5 million teens.

We hope that this current wave of public attention helps more communities engage in an authentic and sustained dialog about what teens are experiencing every day at school. We honestly hope and dream that one day we won’t even have to talk about it – that we’ll create the kind of tribe where we all belong and where no one has to die just to have their TRUTH heard.

Sincerely,








- To learn more about this critical issue and to understand why teens do what they do, or to create your own research-based TEEN TRUTH curriculum for the classroom, BUY OUR NEW BOOK, “Teen Truth: Why Youth Have Something to Hide.” CALL TEEN TRUTH today to book a screening of our film for your school, “TEEN TRUTH: BULLY & SCHOOL VIOLENCE.”

Remember, if you’re not being the difference, what are you doing? Nothing.

We’re all called names that have nothing to do with who we are. And we are all guilty of doing the same to others. Name-calling is one of the most common forms of bullying that I see when I’m on the road with TEEN TRUTH. Growing up I certainly was called many names – sometimes out of playfulness but often out of malice. I still see other students slammed with hurtful words every day when I step on a school campus.

In my opinion the sum of hateful words thrown around school campuses everywhere has increased considerably. I see a lot of people blame TV shows and films that celebrate putting down friends or strangers, but that’s never been something that concerned me as much as the fact that teens too often fail to realize the sheer power of their words. We can place blame all we like for the trend, but it’s up to each one of us to take responsibility for what comes out of our mouths. That’s why we recently partnered with Special Olympics to help end the use of the “r-word” (retard).

During my work developing our new TEEN TRUTH LIVE: PROJECT UNIFY experience, I’ve had the pleasure of working with and developing friendships with several Special Olympic athletes and partners. I have seen these courageous individuals step in front of hundreds of youth to explain first-hand how hurtful the “r-word” is to them. I will admit that I have used the “r-word” in the past, but after working with my new friends and hearing how they feel, I eliminated it from my vocabulary (unless I am describing our partnership in a presentation).

I believe that my experience with my new friends at Special Olympics helped me to THINK DIFFERENTLY about the words I choose and the impact they have on others. Now when I hear the “r-word” I think about my friends Sam, Alyssa, Danielle and Colin who have truly been scarred by this hurtful word.

We all have a right to speak our minds. I believe firmly in freedom of speech and our collective right to use our VOICES to express our TRUTHS. But I also believe that in our quest to share what we hold inside, we must choose our words carefully.

I challenge you to think about whether or not you are using words that correctly describe who people really are. Are your words authentic? Do they speak the TRUTH? Or do they just feed into hurtful stereotypes and other forms of common bullying?

Sadly, the common expression, “sticks and stones will break your bones, but words will never hurt you” does not apply anymore. Words like “f*g,” “id*ot,” “b*tch,” and “r*tard” can leave a scar on someone’s spirit that will last far longer than a physical mark caused by a stick or stone.

I challenge you to think about the power of your words.

Do they help or hurt? Would you want them thrown at you? If the answer is “no” then they’re probably words you shouldn’t use.

Sincerely,

- To learn more about Erahm’s story and how it has inspired him to BE THE DIFFERENCE, READ our book, Teen Truth: Why Youth Have Something to Hide.

Last week Erahm and I had the privilege of keynoting the annual CADA Conference in Reno, NV. CADA is the California Association of Directors of Activities, and I believe it is one of the premier educator conferences in the country.

The conference delivers a wealth of knowledge, friendly connections, and entertaining networking events. The theme of the conference this year was PEACE. LOVE. CADA…A LEADERSHIP REVOLUTION.

TEEN TRUTH produced a unique keynote specifically for this year’s theme that delivered a message calling for activity directors to rise to the challenge and recognize the important position they hold on the school campus.

As a former ASB President, I can honestly say that what I am doing today has a direct correlation to my experience with activities. Whether it is sports, music, theatre, clubs, or straight up student leadership programs, these programs are what make school fun and worth attending for many kids.

By now you understand why I feel activities are essential to every school campus, however there is proof that many people disagree. One day after we delivered our keynote address we discovered three of the conference attendees had been laid off.

The question that I am now wondering is: Will the youth and educators of America let this happen or will they stand up and lead a revolution in education unlike anything we have ever seen before?

I believe it is time for students and educators to work together to save school from the bureaucrats and politicians that are too worried about the bottom line. The bottom line is if we don’t have passionate activity directors uniting our youth through meaningful activities we will create a chain reaction of disconnection and apathy that will destroy the vibrant culture of our schools.

Sincerely,

Check out this INSIGHT from TEEN TRUTH co-founders and speakers ERAHM CHRISTOPHER and JC POHL…

Over the past two years we received several requests for a follow-up youth training program and responded by releasing the ground breaking TEEN TRUTH PLUS experience. In an effort to give students a stronger voice we expanded the TEEN TRUTH: FILM FESTIVAL to 20 schools in seven states, two Canadian provinces and the Mariana Islands.

Today, we are excited to announce a brand new product that represents everything we’ve learned from students, parents and educators over the past five years on the road. Our new creation combines our experience with proven social psychology principles to reveal a hidden truth that helps answer the question of “why?”

Why are some schools great and others are struggling with success?

Why are we all feeling so disconnected?

Why do students bully?

Why are kids lonely?

We are proud to present our first ever book, TEEN TRUTH: Why Youth Have Something to Hide. This innovative tool fuses a traditional book with a practical curriculum that you can teach and your students can read.

Filled with true stories about youth from the road, life lessons learned from the TT founders, and proven social psychology principles that focus on why we act the way we do; TEEN TRUTH attempts to explain why our youth are hiding and why.

We would like to invite all TRUTH Tribe members and our family of school clients to explore elements of this book as it is now being offered exclusively in our store located at www.teentruthlive.com/store/ for 20% off the regular cover price. In the coming weeks you will also be able to find the book on Amazon.com and other online outlets.

We believe once you read the TRUTH inside, you will want to know more about why our youth have something to hide.

Sincerely,

As a writer, I’m constantly working with words, molding and shaping them, bending and tweaking them, trying to get them into the perfect combination to express exactly what I want to say. If I don’t, I run the risk of not being understood, or worse, saying something I don’t mean.

As I think back to my teen years, I said a lot of things I didn’t mean – sometimes to fit in, sometimes to make someone else feel better, sometimes just to convince myself of something I knew wasn’t true. I remember the times when I got careless and said things that I quickly came to regret. With the wrong words, it only takes a split second to hurt another person.

But the same is true for choosing the right words. Words like, “I care,” and “are you ok?” and “I’m here for you.”

I still remember all the mean things that were said to me by the bullies in my life. I remember the kids who stood by and laughed at my expense. But I also remember the people who at the risk of not being seen as “cool,” reached out to me to let me know that I wasn’t alone.

At some point we each have to decide how we want to show up in the world. It’s an important decision, because in this life, you get what you give.

I hope you’ll choose the words that reflect your own TRUTH. When you say what you mean, you get what you deserve.

- Sarah McGowan is the TEEN TRUTH REPORT Editor and Producer. Committed to social justice and community building, Sarah helped create a national best-practices youth court for the city of San Diego, a year-long restorative justice curriculum for San Diego High and a public art program for teens. Sarah is a writer, photographer and editor based in Los Angeles, CA

On April 9th, 2008 my wife and I were blessed with the arrival of our baby girl. The hospital made us stay for a two-day “observation period” so they could make sure our daughter was ready to go. But really I think they were observing whether we were ready to go.

As new parents we were both excited and nervous to raise our first child, so naturally we were open to whatever insight the nurses could offer. As several nurses visited us around the clock it became apparent that they often offered conflicting advice. My wife and I found this both confusing and demoralizing because we just wanted to provide our baby with the best care we could, but no one seemed to agree on what that was.

Thankfully, the inconsistent advice did not hinder us from raising a happy, healthy young girl but it did inspire us to relay what we learned to as many friends as we could that were expecting. We didn’t want others to feel as helpless as we did. As we raise our daughter we continue to share what we have learned with those who are on the same child-rearing journey. I realize that just being a father does not make me an expert on how to raise a child, but I believe it is extremely important for me to share what I have learned.

When I speak in front of students, parents or educators I often mention that I am not an expert. I do not have a degree in psychology, education or counseling. I’m just a filmmaker who is passionate about listening to students and giving them a VOICE.

Since we began this incredible journey, JC and I have been listening to and learning from students who offer us an incredible amount of truth, insight and inspiration. After five years of being on the road, speaking to over one million youth we feel it’s finally time to share what we have learned in a new book we’re calling (no surprise) TEEN TRUTH.

We’re thrilled to be in the final stages of production on our book and look forward to sharing our stories, insight and research with you. It’s another step in the journey towards creating a community of compassion and an opportunity to begin a meaningful dialog with the teens we care about.

Sincerely,

Taking the time
Lending a hand.
Expecting nothing in return
Just being themselves.

Wanting to help.
Changing the world.
They go unnoticed
Every day people are heroes.

- Lauren Pace, a student at Valley Forge High School in Cleveland, OH, was so moved by the TEEN TRUTH LIVE experience when JC came to her school that she wrote a poem about every day heroes, moving JC, her teachers and fellow students to tears. JC promptly gave her a TRUTH Tag to wear, as she lives her TRUTH everyday inspiring those she meets.

In 2009, I switched this tradition up and found a new way of thinking that has helped me greatly. Having seen the impact of this decision over the years, I thought it would be worth sharing with you and your efforts to make 2012 an amazing year of personal and professional growth.

It all started back in 2008 in an effort to eat healthier, I decided to give up french fries for the year. Of course, living in America, where fries are served with virtually every meal, that task became increasingly hard, and I made it until around the end of February before my love for those tasty little treats overcame yet another New Year’s Resolution.

It was at this time that I thought, “There has to be a better way.” So I decided to try something different. Much like a football team motto or a corporate slogan, I decided to boil my New Year’s Resolution down to one word…something that could impact all facets of my life, while at the same time give me the opportunity to succeed in actually keeping my resolution.

So in 2009 I chose the word VISION as my one word resolution. This word proved to be an interesting theme for my year. I ultimately quit my day job, joined the TEEN TRUTH speaking team full time, and helped to develop TEEN TRUTH into the national brand that it is today. Constantly reflecting on the word VISION truly helped me stay focused and lead me to great personal happiness by year’s end.

In 2010, I looked for something new, and I settled on the word BALANCE. Due to many stresses in my life I felt that my relationships, my career, and time spent with my family had been thrown out of balance. So during a year when I felt that things were spinning out of control, I magically found that BALANCE when I moved from Los Angeles to Austin, discovering Yoga, a great community, and my new found enjoyment of hiking the tree-lined hills of Texas. During a year that seemed to be completely disconnected, once again, I happily found myself in true BALANCE by year’s end.

As I started 2011, I was struggling for my yearly word until I sat down to watch my favorite movie, THE BIG LEBOWSKI, on New Year’s Eve. As the main character often professes, “The Dude abides,” it came to me: With all the changes in my life over the last few years I had to simply ABIDE for the year. So nervously I did. And what a year it turned out to be. TEEN TRUTH had a record setting year, I found a wonderful woman with whom I share a very balanced and healthy bond with, I have grown much closer to my family, and Austin, TX has become a comfortable home for me.

With 2012 now upon us, and a year of abiding in my past, I feel my new resolution will be to PUSH. This year I will set out to grow my personal relationships through showing love and attention to those close to me, I will grow TEEN TRUTH to reach newer heights than it has ever reached before, and I will grow my personal knowledge and happiness by starting my first year at Texas State – San Marcos studying for a Masters in Marriage and Family Therapy. Through all of this, I am committing to PUSH as hard as I can to make sure I grow on all fronts.

So, as we head into 2012, I am wondering…What will YOU do?

Sincerely,

Evan Lieberman was born on December 6, 1991. He was born in the same town as I was, and put through the same school system. I was two years younger than Evan, and while I knew him by name I never knew him personally. What I do know is that Evan was no stranger to bullying. But what I remember about him was that I never saw him putting in less than 100% into what he did.

Over the summer evan was involved in a car crash. It was on a weekday morning on the way to work, everyone was wearing a seatbelt, and no one was under the influence. The driver fell asleep at the wheel, and so had the other three passengers. Evan was rushed to the hospital, and passed away a few weeks later. When I went to his funeral, people would say that “there is no lesson to be learned” because it was simply an accident and there is nothing anyone could have done to stop it. For me there wasn’t necessarily something to learn, but something to teach.

I was bullied all through middle school as many are. To deal with it I just alienated myself from everybody, hoping that it would just get better eventually. What I recognized later on was that the only way for it to get better would be for me to take it into my own hands. In high school I started to try to reintegrate myself into the student body, and slowly but surely it worked.

The next part of my life came when I heard Erahm speak. It was truly incredible to see everything I had tried to learn my whole life put into a one hour presentation.

“I didn’t really understand how the power of my efforts began to change my life until I experienced TEEN TRUTH LIVE.  On November 23rd, 2009, I was sitting in an auditorium in the front row where Erahm Christopher was delivering the presentation. The TEEN TRUTH BULLY FILM and Mr. Christopher’s presentation made me aware of how my actions had impacted others and I felt compelled to do something about it.

At that moment, Erahm said to all of us “I am going to count down from five and before I reach one I want someone to stand up and tell me how they are going to BE THE DIFFERENCE in their school”.  He shouted “five”, but no one stood up. He continued, “four”, but still no one had the courage to stand up.

I decided I wasn’t going to be like everyone else. He shouted “three” and I stood up.  Mr. Christopher approached me and said, “What are you going to do to BE THE DIFFERENCE?”  I was full of emotion and without wasting a moment I said, “I am going to look out for the people in my school who are made fun of. I am going to stand up against the bullies in my school and I am going to make a difference”!  I looked at Mr. Christopher and he knew I meant every word of what I said.”

I knew I had a responsibility to share that message with others, and that was a responsibility I did not take lightly.

Now in college I laugh at the problems of the past. I am who I am, and I can only be proud of that. But taking into account everything that I have been able to learn, there is still one thing I realize I didn’t do right. When I was younger I thought there was no hope. I thought that I had no choice but to accept the fact that I would be bullied. But Life is too short to give up on any part of your life. Anyone has the power to change the environment around them.

For those who know TTL, the path is so much easier. They have a team of incredible people to help them help others. At the same time, it means there are no excuses. When I went to schools asking to bring TTL, they told me no. But “no” just means you haven’t asked the right question. 6 months later, J.C. was presenting at 3 schools to over 2000 students and faculty about making a difference. And at 18 years old, I had defeated the one obstacle that had held me back from being the best person I could be.

Everyone has the chance to make a difference, but that doesn’t mean that chance will last forever. Evan Lieberman did the best he could in life, but unfortunately his life came to a tragic end with no reasonable explanation.

There are no excuses when it comes to the things that are holding you back. It may be difficult to stop others from bullying you, but it’s not difficult to stand up to someone who bullies someone else. Making a difference in the lives of others doesn’t only help those who can’t help themselves, it gives you the power to make a difference in your own life. It is a difficult first step to take, but it makes life a lot easier once you do.

It took courage to stand up for myself because I didn’t know if anyone would stand up for me. But when I stood up for others, I was never alone. It only gave me a greater determination to be a difference maker.

At Carnegie Mellon University there is little judgement. People put so much effort into their classes there is simply not enough time at the end of the day to make fun of others. But just because it is not as apparent here does not mean it is still not a huge problem across the country that we need to solve.

It only takes one person to make a difference. Make a difference in the life of someone else, and you make the world a better place. At the end of the day you are not only improving the world for someone else, you are improving the world for yourself.

I made a difference in the lives of people I didn’t know, and I have no idea what that will do to their lives. What I know is that it has made a bigger difference in my life than I could have ever anticipated.

Make a difference for others. Make a difference for yourself. Stand Up. Show the world how great is to be alive.

BE THE DIFFERENCE that makes the world a better place.

- Andrew Schwartz saw the TTL: BULLY & SCHOOL VIOLENCE presentation five years ago. He is now a student at Carnegie Mellon University (Information Systems ‘15 and Economics ‘15).